Trump Vows To Lure World Class Players Away From China

NEW YORK- In a statement yesterday to ESPN FC, President-elect Donald Trump vowed to lure world class soccer talents away from China and to the MLS. The key, as Trump put it, would be "appealing to their lazy, vulnerable side." Trump said "most of these players are just looking for a scenic route to drive all the way through to retirement. They don't want to be with those Commies when they can be living the American Dream." 

When told what Shanghai SIPG paid for Oscar last week, Trump remarked, "HA! How much yen is that, like 12 billion?"

The President-elect was not amused and even called it "chump Chinese change" before hanging up the phone. Time will tell if Donald Trump can bring home jobs from China.