USL/NRA To Test Actual "Live Shootouts" To Settle Ties

PHOENIX- In a recent futile Poll, 68% of American soccer fans would like to see "more guns in the game." With the recurrent dwindling buzz around gun control being disregarded once again, the NRA is looking to expand their market. One NRA spokesperson transiently told TFBF journalists on Monday, "Ties are unAmerican. Guns are American. Two birds with one stone."

The USL, in partnership with the NRA, will be the first League in history to settle ties with live ammunition shootouts. The proposed shootouts will be a series of targets on the goal that players must shoot at with an assortment of weapons. 

This change comes at an opportune time for the NRA since there hasn't been a school shooting in weeks.